iscribe

In the latter half of the 1990s and continuing into the new millennium, Intelligent Design gained traction in the US public school system. If you’ve never heard of Intelligent Design you’d be forgiven if you thought it had anything to do with science or architectural design, let alone intelligence. Critics – i.e., scientists, educators, atheists and non-Christians, people who understood the sinister intent behind it  – refer to Intelligent Design as creationism masquerading as pseudoscience; trying to get science-engaged theology’s foot in the school room door.

Intelligent Design, debunked by the scientific community as a concept that has no scientific consensus, is the brainchild of the US Christian and politically conservative think tank, Discovery Institute. The neutral business and product names fail honest Abe’s litmus test. I wait patiently for South Park’s Stan, who called Scientology “a scam” in the classic Trapped in the Closet episode, to confront Intelligent Design. Though not a devotee of South Park I loved that episode, but I’m pretty sure Tom Cruise and John Travolta didn’t appreciate being Trapped in the Closet.

In the self-proclaimed land of the free and the home of the brave, whilst facing legal challenges in the US – an evangelical Christian holy grail where 69% of adults believe angels exist and 34% take as gospel truth reincarnation – Intelligent Design skipped across the pond to an island where, in this the 21st century, princes and knights dwell and the common folk are ruled by an hereditary King. If we Brits really want to keep the monarchy and all its trappings, let’s go for the full package and bring back jousting; Premier League style.

A UK 2016 YouGov survey reported that just 41% of British Christians believe there is an actual Creator, nearly half of those accepted fate or destiny rather than a heaven or an everlasting soul. In a 2020 YouGov poll, nearly half of Americans claim religion is “very important” in their lives compared to slightly over half (55%) of Britons who don’t belong to any particular religion.

Scotland is separate from the UK – which is the wish of nearly half of Scottish voters according to numerous polls – with their own 2022 census. ‘None’ was the largest category of belief in Scotland with 51.1% of the Scottish population giving that answer when asked: “What religion, religious denomination or body do you belong to?” Makes you wish ‘None’ was a ballot choice come election time.

Since 2016, humanists have conducted more weddings in Scotland each year than either the Church of Scotland, the Catholic church or any other religion. By 2022 humanist marriages outnumbered all religious ceremonies combined. Cool.

Mutual respect and walking diverse spiritual paths

God’s not dead. Something that doesn’t exist can’t die. I personally don’t believe in any manner of god. If you do, and however you perceive him — her, them, or it — to be, I respect your beliefs. I’m also interested in your spirituality, not as a potential convert but as one who wishes to gain knowledge, leading to understanding. I would appreciate reciprocity.

In a late 1950s school social studies class I was taught mutual respect of all briefs and customs by one of only three enlightened teachers who impacted my academic upbringing. The others – especially bottle in bottom drawer Morrison, phys-ed psycho Petrenko, corporal punishment SS-wannabe Zavitz – didn’t make the grade.

“Be afraid. Be very afraid.”

I’ve read the Bible but admittedly I’m no scholar by a longshot. If the Old Testament was a Netflix series each episode would need to be preceded with the voiceover trigger warning: “This programme contains scenes of flashing images, violence and threatening behaviour, genocide, misogyny, incest and frequent begetting. Viewer discretion is advised.”

Both testaments of the Bible contain verses telling Man to fear God. Actually, if everything in the OldTestament alone was true I’d more than fear God; I’d be scared shitless. Read Proverbs and Revelation then, to quote Geena Davis’s character in The Fly, “Be afraid. Be very afraid.”

And they shall dwell in the unelected House of Lords seemingly forever

Americans like to believe in the separation of church and state. No US elected head of state shall ever be the leader of a congressional sanctioned religion, the protection from which is written into a codified constitutional amendment. Mind you, “God bless you and God bless the United States of America” is the must-have tagline of any politician worthy of their homeland security merit badge.

Where an omnipotent God stands when it comes to America has never been in doubt among the stars-and-stripes faithful. He, the gender specific Almighty with the James Earl Jones voice and persona of Charlton Heston keynoting a convention of the National Rifle Association, is for ‘em, not agin’ ‘em; whoever ‘em may be.

In the dis-United Kingdom we don’t pretend to be concerned about that separation of church and state millarky. Brits embrace it! Charles III is the hereditary (i.e., anointed and unelected) head of state for the UK and 14 other independent Commonwealth countries. Thanks to Henry VIII the current monarch is Supreme Governor of the Church of England and Defender of the Faith.

Even though Charles cannot vote on legislation tabled by Parliament, all legislation passed by “his parliament” requires Royal Assent before becoming law. In reserved seats in the unelected House of Lords are two archbishops and 24 bishops of Charles’s Church of England. Their privileged presence gives special meaning to the final words of the 23rd Psalm; “and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever”. Called the Lords Spiritual, these bishops of His Majesty’s church can review, amend and vote on legislation passed by the ‘elected’ House of Commons.

Is the King’s duality a thorny crown to the separation of church and state? Is having reserved seats for bishops of the state sanctioned church within the second chamber of parliament not bordering on the UK being accused of becoming a theocratic monarchy? A religion is a religion and a state is a state unless the twain have met, e.g., Afghanistan, Iran, Saudi Arabia and Vatican City.

Using “God’s will” and “Act of God” as a scapegoat

Few of God’s children are excited about their lot in life. Religion is but a manifestation of this dissatisfaction. Religion flourishes in the valleys of despair and feeds off the backs of humanity’s endless torments. The pious in frock and tapestry fuel fear and uncertainty among the meek; who, without specifics, are promised they will inherit the Earth – immediately after the righteous have raped the land, poisoned the water and pilfered the treasury. Over centuries despot and wannabe dictators have been pontificating the same poisoned fears to subjugate the masses.

Where a God’s professed involvement is most reprehensible is in the overused pronouncement from the guardians of the pulpit, who cloak tragic events and horrific human loss simply as, “God’s will!” Even the small print on transportation vouchers exculpate corporate liability where an ‘Act of God’ is used as a legal scapegoat for a bus crash, train wreck or aircraft falling from the sky.

Were I God, I would release the ten plagues upon anyone who dares to have the audacity to use my name to cover up political negligence, corporate product failure or human incompetence:

“I created the Heavens and Earth in just six days. I brought forth light with just four words. I created the first man from clay and a woman from that bugger’s rib! I parted the fracking Red Sea and didn’t get my feet wet. So how dare anyone blame me for not properly latching the cargo door on the 747 and killing all onboard!”

Discarding the crutch with action not prayer

It’s all moot. Men and women of the cloth and their believers can’t prove the existence of an all-powerful deity just as I’m unable to debunk. Stalemate. When I die and suddenly find myself standing before St Peter or Davey, the relief doorman at the pearly gates, then ach! Bad call. Shit happens, eh? I’ll be proven wrong and semi-willingly accept the fate the smiling righteous will happily bestow upon me. However, if I’m right then I’m worm meat.

All Gods are humanity’s crutch and excuse for terrorising innocents. Yes, people pray in times of need, greed or despair. Does prayer provide comfort in times of hopelessness? If it helps, go for it.

Think logically, people. Gods will not feed the hungry, provide decent shelter or access to free health care. Gods won’t find you a job with a working wage, or deliver you and your loved ones from humanity’s torments.

Our political masters need to stop convening international conferences in world-class cities and resorts to discuss hunger, homelessness and victims of wars whilst staying at luxury resorts, gorging on gourmet meals or arriving on private jets to a climate crisis summit. Politicians talking endlessly about what is already known to those that Keir Starmer terms “with skin in the game”, and table five to ten year projection targets that rarely see the light of day. These are a pat on the back, shared-ego moments for the world’s kings, presidents, prime ministers and autocrats. Great media, lots of pics and soundbites for the political junkies back home.

People need enlightened leaders who will listen to those actually facing humanity’s torments and will take immediate action to deliver resources and tools to those wanting to better themselves. Action, not prayer or politico-bureaucratic gobbledygook, will deliver hope to hundreds of millions who only want to be able to feed and house their family, to live safe and secure from war and civil unrest, to breathe unpolluted air and drink clean water, and have access to universal healthcare. Not much to ask, right.

Action will deliver more than prayer. I guarantee it. Swear to God!